Why is the last half hour of sleep the best?
Why are my children immaculately dressed each day but they can't seem to find the trash can or dishwasher at home?
Why don't cats have opposable thumbs and feed themselves?
Why is it that the toilet paper roll is only empty when I use the bathroom?
How come I don't check for TP before I sit down?
Why is there never any extra rolls of TP in those same bathrooms?
Why is it that I can't locate important papers I had in hand last week, but I can recite the preamble to the Constitution I learned in 5th grade?
Why do my sisters remember events in our childhood differently than I do?
How come I can't find that chin hair when I look for it daily and then I discover it while I'm in a meeting and I can't keep from touching it only to bring attention to the damn thing?
How come my son always calls me the moment I finish putting the groceries into the car with an urgent request for some item?
Why does my daughter always text me, then get mad when I don't pick her up on time because unlike her, I don't spend my day with my phone vibrating in my pocket?
Why is my hair curly just on one side of my head?