Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Increasing my vocabulary so can appear younger and cooler

I frequently troll the Urban Dictionary so I can keep up with modern slangisms. Face it, I'm a middle aged mother who is struggling to communicate with her kids. Of course if I actually used any of the words my kids use, they would roll their eyes and tell me to "stop! stop right now!" But I also like to scroll thru UD and find words that tickle my fanny.

Carcolepsy: a condition affecting buddies on a trip who fall asleep as soon as the car starts moving, providing no company or driving help. This is me. I am a car sleeper. I once slept from Washington State to New Jersey. Of course I had mono at the time.

Bedgasm: A feeling of complete and utter euphoria which peaks when climbing into bed at the end of a long day, a long road trip or hours of extremely strenuous physical activity. Under perfect conditions, the physical release has been likened to that of an intense sexual experience. Our new bed is bliss. We can't wait to get into it every night.

Kitchenheimers: When you're in the kitchen going around in circles because you can't remember what you were doing there. C'mom, we all do this, duh!

Destinesia: When you get to where you were intending to go, you forget why you were going there in the first place. See above!

Snow hysteria: When the populace's fear of a snowstorm creates traffic jams and general panic way before any flakes even fall. Usually turns out to be a totally disproportionate response to a minor snowstorm. I live near Seattle, we don't do well with snow. We have whole news casts devoted to the "possibility" of snow. We are shut down by 1 inch of snow.

Mis-wave: To return a wave to someone you think is waving at you, but is actually waving to the person behind you. Usually results in embarrassment and introversion. Of course, as I age and my eye sight fails, I'm doing the opposite also and not waving when I know someone and am now considered unfriendly bitch.

Moneymoon: The time after your purchase of a good or service and before 'buyer's remorse' happens. Do you want me to name off all the crap I own that I just "had to have"?

So there are a few new words I'd love to be able to use in real life but I'm never that quick on the uptake to respond accordingly but I'll think of it later.

New word: Misrepartee: All those witty and clever remarks you think of later after the conversation is over. I submitted it to UD, I'll see if it gets posted!

update: DENIED!!

From: info@urbandictionary.com
Sent: Wed 2/11/09 11:24 AM

Thanks for your definition of Misrepartee! Editors reviewed your entry and have decided to not publish it.

3 comments:

  1. These were great! You are way cool in my book! It is funny how teenagers of every generation think they are the ones who invented cool. LOL I am going to try my best to remember these and use them. My friends will be in awe at my coolness! ha,ha!

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  2. Well now I feel old 'cause I never heard of those either! *sigh*

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  3. I always end-up looking-up sexual innuendos that I've never heard before on UrbanDictionary.

    Consequently, I always feel like a perv.

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